I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She tied me up with her honor cords...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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