A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Randomize