there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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