I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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