that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
