420 ftw
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize