You work out of a Hotel?
just tell him i said nine months
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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