I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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