someone owes me an orgasm
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
