Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
she told me i tasted like america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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