Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
