i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
