booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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