God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
