And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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