On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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