Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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