i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
