then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize