he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
