Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry i_love_tits hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(917): View more from New York City

And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.

Fav 14 2298 2744
share tweet
(847): View more from Illinois

okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.

Fav 20 878 5220
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(765): View more from Indiana

You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged

Fav 8 1285 3786
share tweet
(916): View more from California

I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule

Fav 8 4225 810
share tweet
(309): View more from Illinois

Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.

Fav 2 1517 805
share tweet
(732): View more from New Jersey

he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex

Fav 4 1814 1293
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection

Fav 7 1646 811
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas

Fav 6 865 554
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(253): View more from Washington

Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.

Fav 0 14 41
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT