jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
