and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
