If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.