I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
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