I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
