You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
