Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
