So drunk, too bad you don't want this
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize