Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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