Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize
