Sponge bath it is.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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