We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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