I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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