did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize