I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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