Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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