i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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