Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
