fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
