The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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