Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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