i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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