I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
It all started with a game of naked twister.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
