I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize