I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
