He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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