Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
