And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
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Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
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I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize