Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
